How did I get here?

This month I'll have been married 24 years. Next month my son will be 19. Later this year I'll be 47 and my daughter 14.

Sorry! I am my Dad and he'll have been gone 25 years this October, that's more than half my life I've been without my Dad! No that's a whole other post... or a whole blog... or lots of counselling. Briefly I have spent a lot of time regretting and over compensating that I could never show my Dad that I could be a success in life.

Over the next few years we hit many big milestones. Next year obviously is our silver wedding anniversary. I'll have a son who will be in his 20s! The year after he'll be 21 and my Daughter will be 16! Then the year after that I'll be 50!!! (running out of !'s you know)

Somewhere along the line I went to sleep a teenager and woke up a middleaged "responsible" adult. Problem is I don't often feel like one in some ways I often feel like the teenager - you should have seen my son and I at the London Music Show. Difficult to know who was the more excited at times - I must have dragged him back to the Rob Williams stand 5 times!

What is growing up? What is grown up? Do people knowingly transition from various stages of their lives or does it just happen and then you suddenly realise that you've moved on? Seems to me my life is somewhat the latter version really.

Not that it's really a problem - acceptance is the key, accept who and where I am is the key and realising that some magic something will happen and that it'll all seem sorted out just isn't going to happen. As M Scott Peck points out... "Life is difficult".

Comments

  1. Morton Shadow9 July 2009 at 13:56

    Aye, as long as you're still on the lookout for a little bit of magic, you'll never grow old.

    xxx
    Mort

    p.s. wrod vrecificatoin: helish. I kid you not!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Suburbia9 July 2009 at 16:43

    I still don't want to grow up! It is only the outside that ages I think. Life grinds you down sometimes but basically, underneath it all, it's great if you can still find a little bit of teenager in you. Sounds like you have / did with your son. Aren't we lucky sometimes? :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Liz Hinds9 July 2009 at 17:47

    According to my blog feed you had 193 posts I hadn't read! It's only 2 so I'll get down to reading those now.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Liz Hinds9 July 2009 at 17:52

    I think growing up is very much an attitude. Some people are grown up at 18; others never grow up or acept responsibility. I hope I'm halfway between that in that i can be mature but I am very silly as well!

    There's that saying you see on t-shirts and magnets etc
    Growing old is compulsory.
    Growing up is optional.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Cynnie9 July 2009 at 17:55

    my 24 yo daughter is now living with me..
    Ive never felt so old in my life..
    it helps that she's constantly pointing out how old i am ..

    I hate kids

    ReplyDelete
  6. punxxi10 July 2009 at 22:04

    I think if people are really honest with themselves, they will find they feel no different inside than they did as a teen...that's my excuse why I'm still about 15 mentally...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Col10 July 2009 at 22:37

    You and me both mate. Still, live the dream eh?

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Tom Edwards' Poem "Why I don't drink anymore"

Thanks to my friend DeeJay for pointing this out to me - it was on a BBC2 show. An excellent summary of alcoholism I changed because I have the sickness of alcoholism, alcoholism doesn't come in bottles it comes in people. You should have seen me. I drank for happiness and became unhappy; I drank for joy and became miserable. I drank to be out-going and became self-centred; I drank for sociability and became argumentative and lonely; I drank for sophistication and became crude and obnoxious. I drank for friendship and made enemies, I drank to soften sorrow and wallowed in self-pity; I drank for sleep and awakened without rest. I drank for strength and felt weak. I drank for masculinity and it sapped my potency; I drank medicinally and got sick. I drank because I thought my job called for it and lost my job. I drank to stimulate thought and blacked out. I drank to make conversation and got to where I couldn't talk at all; I drank to forget and became haunted. I drank for freedom...
Read more

Guitar Review - Vintage VE2000GG Gordon Giltrap Signature 12 string

Image
Folks will remember my purchase a few weeks back of the Vintage Gordon Giltrap VE2000GG 12 string to replace my old Yamaha which sadly has seen better days... My requirement was for a nice playable 12 string electro-acoustic.  Most of my stuff is as you know acoustic rock orientated in the David Gray, John Mayer genre.  I'd had my eye on a Gordon Giltrap for a couple of years now anyway since a) I'm a big Giltrap fan b) I'd heard said Mr Giltrap use the 6 string version live a couple of times and was impressed c) it seems incredible value for money. Now then my life was made a touch my complicated by the appearance of the Paul Brett signature 12string.  This is a slight oddity in that this is a parlour sized guitar which to be honest wasn't my initial desire but has received rave reviews and also has been designed as a 12string from the ground up - unlike the Gordon Giltrap which is an adaptation of a 6 string design.  Not unusual to be fair most 12 strings ar...
Read more